Attention HellMart Shoppers!

"    Attention HellMart Shoppers! " Podcast
Attention HellMart Shoppers! is a twice monthly horror/comedy audio-drama. Join the staff of HelloMart, a big box super-store built on top of the gates of hell, as they battle the forces of evil in order to bring you the best customer service minimum wage can provide.


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Join the adventures of the staff of HelloMart, a big box super store, unfortunately situated above the gates of hell. These retail wage slaves battle the forces of evil while bringing you the best in minimum wage customer service.

Season: 1
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Daniel Richmond was living the high life in Manhattan when he was convicted of a few dozen counts of securities fraud and some light treason, but he served his time. In fact he's out of prison early and enrolled in a work release...

Season: 1 Episode: 1
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Daniel Richmond was living the good life in the elite world of New York finance when he took the fall for his firm's dirty dealings. Now he's out of jail on work release and he has to figure out how to make it at HelloMart, a big box store in the...

Season: 1 Episode: 2
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Daniel has an unfortunate phone conversation and spills a little blood. He may or may not find those shoelaces. Please leave us a review on iTunes and follow us on twitter @thehellomart

Season: 1 Episode: 3
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Daniel and Emily are hungover after a night out and a customer is looking for a toy. Also there's a thing with a leprechaun. Like us on Facebook, follow us on Twitter @thehellomart and review us on iTunes!

Season: 1 Episode: 4
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The gang searches for the Phantom Shoplifter's hoard and have an unexpected meeting in the basement while Jimmy and Ruth deal with the murderous Leprechaun. Please consider leaving us an iTunes review, following us on twitter @thehellomart or liking...

Season: 1 Episode: 5
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The guys meet Valerie's fiance, who may not be entirely on the up and up and Chet bakes some cookies. Evil Cookies. Review us on itunes! Follow us on Twitter! Like us on Facebook!

Season: 1 Episode: 6
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Jake feels like Chicken Tonight. Everyone else wants to get some Armando Ferrari and no one seems especially worried about the interdimensional pirate attack. Review us on iTunes, follow us on twitter, like us on facebook!

Season: 1 Episode: 7
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It's Sample Day! The store is extra busy, Emily deals with a delicate situation and it's a party in electronics! Please leave us an itunes review! Like us on Facebook! Follow us on Twitter! Visit our website at attentionhellmartshoppers.com. Attention...

Season: 1 Episode: 8
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Zombie Dance Party! Like us on Follow us on Go to Attention Hellmart Shoppers! is a part of the Fatecrafters Network. We reccomend other high quality and entertaining Fatecrafters shows such as

Season: 1 Episode: 9
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The gang is interviewed about the goings on at the store. Jimmy has a choice to make and Emily prepares for the joys of motherhood. Stay tuned, our PATREON launches in ONE WEEK! Keep up to date by following us on twitter @thehellomart Like us on ....

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 Big News, Everyone! We are launching our PATREON!    I love making this show. It's a true passion of mine, and I'd like to make as much of it as I can! That's where you come in! What do you get out of becoming a Patron? ...

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It's 2005 and Halloween brings a visitor and a new employee. With special guest star Rhiannon McAfee! We are Listener supported! Visit You too can get bonus episodes, early acces to new episodes and so much more! Attention HellMart Shoppers is part...

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Guess who's back! Jimmy and Chet face the Pumpkin King again. Will it be a grim battle to the death? Probably not. Go to our Patreon to get extra episodes and tons of great perks and merchandise! Follow us on twitter @thehellomart Like us on...

Season: 1
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Chet must face the Pumpkin Kng one last time...alone! Visit our patreon to see all the great bonus content available to you now! Follow us on twitter @thehellomart Like us on facebook at facebook.com/attentionhellmartshoppers

Season: 1 Episode: 10
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Daniel struggles to make friends at his new job. Plus more chickens. We are listener supported! visit our patreon for tons of great bonus content! http://patreon.com/attentionhellmartshoppers follow us on twitter @thehellomart like us on facebook at...

Season: 1 Episode: 11
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Daniel uncovers a nefarious scheme at the chicken farm, but is it too late for him to escape? We are entirely listener supported. Help support us and get great bonus content at http://patreon.com/attentionhellmartshoppers follow us on twitter...

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Attention HellMart Shoppers! Thoreau here! This is just a quick update on our schedule for the holidays and the remainder of season 1. Our Christmas special is coming Monday, December 18th, and will be the only episode released in December, and our...

Season: 1
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It's Christmas Eve and Emily arrives in town with no money, no job and a terrible apartment. Will a christmas miracle solve all her problems? Maybe she'll be visited by jolly old St. Nick! It's another holiday flashback episode and this one has...

Season: 1 Episode: 12
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Chet deals with customers, employees, family, and his own shortcomings as manager.  Please support us on PATREON! Go to http://patreon.com/attentionhellmartshoppers to get bonus episodes, early access to new episodes, Stickers, Wallpapers, Music...

Season: 1 Episode: 13
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Chet interviews some prospective employees and Daniel and Emily pay a visit to Billy Ray, the Leprechaun.  Attention HellMart Shoppers! is listener supported. Go to  to pledge your support. For just $1 a month you can help us stay in...

Season: 1 Episode: 14
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Jimmy and his crew stage a heist. Chet also does a thing...kind of. This Episode features Jake Song as Security Guy 1, Laura Bramblette as Security Guy 2, and Jesse Hall as Security Guy 3.  Help support the show on    Attention HellMart...

Season: 1 Episode: 15
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After the big heist the gang is on the run. Chet reaches out to an old adversary, and Merle gets to go for a ride. This is the penultimate episode of season one. With guest star Attention HellMart Shoppers! is . Follow us on twitter, like us on...

Season: 1 Episode: 16
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SEASON 1 FINALE! It's the big showdown at the Hell Gates! Chet makes a choice, Jake has something to crow about and Daniel says stuff that makes people upset. Don't skip out early, the after credits teaser has a very special guest star, and...

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Attention HellMart Shoppers!   Hi everyone, Thoreau here. This is just a quick post to let you all know about two new things we've got going on in the HelloMart this month. First, we have an Easter Episode available for you to listen to. It’s a...

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Attention HellMart Shoppers! We have a brand new Mini-Episode just for you! This tells the tale of (not so) young love in the meat department of HelloMart. We are also just dollars away from making our first Patreon goal. We briefly slipped past it in...

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Independence day is approaching in Strickland and there's trouble in the basement. With special guest star Sarah Golding as Regional Manager Melinda Ashe. Follow us on Twitter @ Like us on Facebook at  Go to...

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Thoreau here! I made a new show! It's called 1994 and it's premiering September 17th, 2018, but for now here's the very frist teaser trailer! If you like HellMart I think you'll like 1994. It stars James Oliva, Jordan Cobb, Paul Miscavage,...

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The Pumpkin King has returned! Will he battle Jimmy to the death? Probably not. 

Season: 2
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November 18, 2019

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Attention HellMart Shoppers! We're now part of The Harmless Entertainment Network, and I'm on a new podcast where we discuss every SuperHero movie ever made! Click the link below and give it a listen!   Check out all our new network has to offer...

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Its getting tough out there, so I'm releasing all mini episodes of Attention Hellmart Shoppers free to the public. No more paywalls. One per day for the next 24 days. The first one takes place in between episodes 1&2. Stay safe. Wash your...

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Our second Mini Episode for your days off wine and quarantine. It takes place between Episodes 2 and 3 and sheds a bit of light on some major events of the first half of Season 1.

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This one takes place between episodes 3 and 4. Billy Ray and Jimmy get into it.

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Carlos and Gunter go on a mission in enemy territory. This Episode takes place between Episodes 4 and 5.

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This one takes place during Episode 6. Remember Armando Ferrari, Jake the Chicken, and the Pirate Attack? This show may have jumped the shark pretty early on.

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This one comes just before Dante's Disco Inferno Part 1, and it stars Paul Sating of Diary of a Madman and Subject: Found. Dylan and Weasel have a run-in with the local law enforcement. Support the show and get early access and exclusive content...

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Meet Chet and Thirsty Jo's dad, and Chet's new boyfriend! It's good, clean, holiday cannibalism! Support the show and get early access and exclusive content at Harmless Entertainment! Follow us on Twitter! Join the conversation in...

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This one takes place during the zombie attack of Dante's Disco Inferno. Sherman saves some customers, but he may have bitten off more than he an chew.

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This one takes place during Episode 7, Dante's Disco Inferno, and stars Chet and Mr and Mrs Bigfoot. Support the show and get early access and exclusive content at Harmless Entertainment! Follow us on Twitter! Join the conversation in our...

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Here's a glimpse into what Ruth's been up to in Hell. 

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What was Gunter up to after the Season 1 finale, when everyone else went to Razzies? Now you'll know!

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It's an Easter Special! Almost timely, eh?

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 It's spring in Strickland, and that means the lawn and garden department is getting busy...unfortunately.  This one has a special guest; Danilo Battistini of Contador De Historias!

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This one features our new Regional Manager Melinda Ashe, played by the one and only Sarah Golding of The Audio Drama Production Podcast and a bazillion other shows. We'll being hearing from her some more on upcoming bonus episodes and lots in season...

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Daniel is showing yet another new employee the ropes! This one you've met before, though. It's Shawn from the Chicken Farm. Is this the newest permanent addition to HelloMart? Only time will tell.

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Gunter and Jimmy have a little chat Support the show and get early access and exclusive content at Harmless Entertainment! Follow us on Twitter! Join the conversation in our Facebook Group

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Danny and Chet just can't seem to connect.

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It's Danny's Birthday! Kinda! This one takes place right after the July 4th Special.

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Chet sets Jake up on a date. That's all you need to know.

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Danny and Chet discuss a very important and divisive subject.

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Gunter and Carlos discuss a plan that couldn't possibly go wrong.

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Emily conducts Chet's Employee Review. It goes swimmingly.

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Carlos and Gunter do an oopsie.

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Jimmy deals with the robot uprising.

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Danny's trying to be responsible. Unfortunately for him, though, Chet considers him essential. 

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